You are the average of 5…

"You are the average of 5 people you hang out with." – Jim Rohn

Jim Rohn was an American author, motivational speaker, and philanthropist and this might just be one of his best quotes ever! Why? Because it's true! So, what does this quote mean though? What is the actual message behind it?

Let me explain.

First, relationships are very important...

Human relationships build your network – it could be friendships, acquaintances, partnerships (business relationships). Your network is the group of people you surround yourself with and these relationships affect the quality of your life. This is why being intentional about your relationships is important.

Ask yourself:
“Who do I want to spend time with?"

What relationships do they have?

Do you have common goals or values?

Building lasting relationships with the right people (those who lift us up) can make life more enjoyable, provide more for us, and build trust that is crucial to our professional lives.

It's easy to get caught up in your daily life with work or personal obligations that you forget about building relationships. It's also easy to be around the same group of people every day at work, meet new people but never see them again, or lose touch with people with who you used to be friends.

Building meaningful relationships is very different than just making acquaintances or business connections. You want your professional relationships to go beyond just sharing information on LinkedIn. They should be people that you can hang out with, open to about things that are personally important, and feel comfortable doing so.

Here are some tips to help you build meaningful relationships and have friends that are there for you.

1) Be involved in your community - Join clubs or community groups where you can meet people outside of work. You'll be able to make connections with people who share similar interests, values, and beliefs as you do. There's also a chance to meet people who have a different way of doing things. You'll be able to learn new skills or pick up useful tips that can help you expand your network.

2) Keep an open mind - Meeting new people is great training for life. It's important to keep an open mind about everyone because many people aren't what you expect them to be like. You'll experience firsthand the stereotypes people place on others, and how those beliefs can be shattered when you get to know someone for who they truly are as a person.

3) Be receptive - When meeting new people, stay open and attentive. Look them in the eye, smile, laugh at their jokes, and nod in agreement. This will encourage them to share even more.

4) Ask Questions: When meeting new people or reconnecting with old friends that you've lost contact with, ask questions so you can build rapport and understand them better.

5) Remember their names - It may be obvious, but it never hurts to say their name during or after the conversation. This will help keep their name in your memory. We often tend to forget the names of people we just met because it seems like a lot of information to memorize, therefore it's important you learn their names right away. It's also polite and shows that you're interested in who they are.

6) Don't judge - When meeting new people or reconnecting with old friends, don't judge them based on their appearance, the neighborhood they live in, etc. It doesn't matter what other people may think of someone and it's important to not be judgmental of other people because you never know who their family is, what type of upbringing they had, or where they're going in life.

7) Reach out - This means sending an email, Facebook message, or chat to someone you haven't spoken to in a while. It's helpful to keep the door open so if something good or bad happens, you have someone to share it with and vice versa. Even if they're not your closest friend, it never hurts to reach out and say hello.

8) Be genuinely interested - Listen to the stories that people share with you and be as genuinely interested as possible. Ask follow-up questions to show that you're listening and pay attention to their answers.

9) Don't gossip - Not only should you avoid saying bad things about other people behind their backs, but always try to talk about other people in a positive manner even when they're not around because this can help strengthen your relationship with them. If someone has wronged either of you in the past and is now trying to apologize for what they did, don't bring up what happened in the past because it can make them feel worse and ruin the progress that's been made.   

10) Be patient - Sometimes people need more time to open up or for trust to build, so don't expect things from others overnight. People also process change at a different pace, so be understanding of this as well.

11) Embrace differences - We all have different personalities and points of view on certain things, which is why it's important to celebrate each other's individuality. You may not always see eye-to-eye with someone you're close with, but it doesn't mean they aren't worth having in your life. It should be okay if friendships are built around mutual understandings while respecting each other's opinions.      

12) Fall in love with who you are becoming- This means to fall in love with the person you're becoming when around a good friend because it helps strengthen your bond. When people feel loved and appreciated by those around them, they'll naturally flourish into better individuals.

13) Set boundaries – remember that you don't have to be friends with everyone. Maintain healthy relationships and notice when a relationship is affecting your mental health or confidence.

14) Don't prioritize toxic people over the ones who lift you up - The phrase "misery loves company" can ring true for some people who constantly put themselves down and only want to hang out with similar people. These kinds of friends bring you down and will continue to drain your energy, so it's best to not be around them. If you feel like their negativity towards the world is starting to rub off on you, distance yourself from that person because it'll make both of your lives better.

15) Above all – be true to yourself. You become who you hang out with.

  Do you find this true in your relationships?

Which of these attributes resonates with you?